Same Sex Marriage…The Debate

The debate on same sex marriage is on December 7th. As though there should be one, however, it’s really an exercise in seeing how some of the Reformed can bite their fundie tongues. Harper’s going to have a tough time reigning some of them in, but we don’t want them to. They’ll be easily baited and true colours could show up as a palette of bigoted homophobia. That’s a painting that could pull the Con-artists into Dante’s Inferno. Steve’s prepped for it though:

Steve Great! O.k, from the top again. Joseph and Mary, your entry is crucial, it has to be timed when the Speaker takes a break. And can you say your lines with more conviction?

Joseph Well, Mary, I’m sure glad you’re not a man and I don’t have to put my penis in a hairy butt. This way I can put it in your butt.

Steve Cut! Cut! Joseph, we can’t have Canadians thinking we endorse anal sex of any kind. Move on to the next lines please.

Mary Why yes, Joseph, and this way I can bend and bow to the wishes of a man, not some dyke who would know my body better. I will layeth down for you whenever you wish and succumb to your powers.
Joseph And look what we begetted, a babe in swaddlings. Oh, I forgot, you were fooling around with that God guy again.
Mary Never mind, think of all the camels you had. In any case, we are a family and must focus on that.
Joseph Why yes, Mary, and that’s the most important thing, procreation. Did you remember to put blue contact lenses in little Jesus’s eyes and the Michael Jackson skin whitener on?
Mary Yes, Joseph. Thanks for the reminder. Should we go to church now?
Joseph What’s that?
Mary You’re so funny, you forgot, it’s that gathering place the Emperor Constantine invented. Hurry or we’ll be late!

Steve That’s a wrap. Wow, when they said you were professionals Frum was right! The script’s a little over my head but if he wrote it , it must be good. Cabinet, tell all the underlings about this. Dismissed.

*Montreal Simon has a good rant about the upcoming debate.