Stephen Harp Seal. Able to drag itself anywhere. Loves ice and anything cold. Eats the little fish so he can be the biggest. Prefers mother seals to have their pups so they can be bludgeoned with inadequate services rather then giving female seals the right to choose. Party style? Close friends gathered to listen to him play his keyboards. Cheap white wine 3/4 glass/person. , Costco or Walmart bulk snacks. Play board games and try not to lose temper if you lose.
Michael Iguana-tieff. Cold blooded lizard out for only it’s own survival. A lashing tongue coated with sweetness to attract prey. Hangs out in the desert looking for opportunities. Beware, he may hug and kiss but he’ll gobble you up if given the chance. Party style? Name drop like hell to attract the cream of some kind of crop: promise adoring fans to do a reading from your book, ensure that ‘the people’ are present only as subserviant workers.
Jack Layton-Rabbit. Kicks with hind feet. Fast runner. Holds onto left foot as feels it gives him luck. Not easy to snare as is fast, like a used care salesman…pops back into hole when chased. If he suspects you are a fellow rabbit he’ll draw you into the tribe. Party style? Pot-luck and gather the attenders in circle before eating to turn what may have been a prayer into a speech. Beer, red wine and ethnic dishes.
Gilles Goosestep. Sticks his neck out because he knows he can. Caution, if struck by Goosestep party wing , it may hurt like hell. Prefers you maintain V formation and he’ll do almost anything to keep it that way although creative experimentation is allowed. Party style? Dancing and talk politics during breaks, ensuring the discussions are intellectual/philisophical. Open bar and catered by sister-in-law.
Elizabeth ‘Kermie’ May. What can I say, ‘It’s not easy being green’.