If Only They Were Normal #20, Vladimir Putin
OK, so sometimes it can be easy to cheer for Putin when he doesn’t buy into U.S. policy, and he’s doing things like aligning Russia with China and the EEC. But basically the guy’s a dink, rules with an iron fist, and won’t leave other countries alone. Russia is a stinking polluted mess selling it’s resources at any cost. So , if Vladimir Putin were normal:
“Dah. I have gone back to the ways of my ancestors and am acting as shaman for the country. Socialism, the circle, not communism combined with faux western democracy. I’ll beat this drum till the Earth is healed and promise to keep my missile in my pocket. Nyet to fucking around with other countries…Russia has to concentrate on Russia and reduce greenhouse gas emissions by 500%. Vodka is out, shrooms are in! We have to take the magical ride together and expand our consciousness if we’re to get out of this mess.
The Steppes are calling, no more G8 stuff, it’s indigenous strength from now on… Gorbachev, eat my cariboo hide!