Sunday Sermon by Crystal Methodist

June 2, 2007 at 11:08 pm 6 comments

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Ha Hoo! Oh parishioners!!! Today we look at Mark. Well, we don’t really LOOK at him, rather, we heed his words. Hmm, perhaps not so much heed as evaluate. No, that wouldn’t be right either. We take in the signifigance of what he’s saying. Yes, I think that’s it.

You know, I had a boy sit beside me in grade 3 who’s name was Mark. We used to say, “What do you call a man correcting schoolwork? Mark”. Hoo hoo hoo. Anways, I digress. “Mary Magdalene, out of whom he had cast seven devils.” — Mark 16:9. Let’s face it, this lady was a tart and Jezebel. Never mind what modern theology may teach and that scholars have found Mark et al were jealous of her close relationship with The Babe in Swaddlings. Mark my word, hoo hoo, if she had of saved her cherry, like myself, she never would have had to have devils cast out.

This atheist slut probably even had , heh hem, oh, can I say it…abortions!! Never mind the etymology of the word means ‘to rise away from’, that’s just fodder for those spiritual types who think they have one over on religion. NO! NO! We must stick hard to the words and interpretations of the biggest political novel ever written….THE BIBLE!

Oops, I seem to have gotten carried away again. Flowers. Yes , who will volunteer to do the flowers next week?

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Entry filed under: abortion, Political Humour, Religon.

Oh Puck Off!!! Harper and The G8 Summit

6 Comments

  • 1. jj  |  June 3, 2007 at 7:19 am

    “Abortion” — if it’s hard for you to say, try “fetal redeployment” instead. 😉

  • 2. harpervalley  |  June 3, 2007 at 8:09 am

    jj…..gooder!!!! perhaps ’embryo enlistment’ . i’ll pass these on to crytal.

  • 3. Wandering Coyote  |  June 3, 2007 at 9:08 am

    Of course what SOME people seem to conveniently overlook about the whole Mary Magdalene thing is that a) Jesus accepted her and b) Jesus first appeared to her upon his resurrection. Hmmmm… He obviously got over any issues he may have had with her, so why can’t everyone else?

  • 4. harpervalley  |  June 3, 2007 at 11:04 am

    coyote…..good points. i don’t think jesus had any issues with her to begin with…he didn’t judge, unlike those who wrote the bible years after christ’s death and were mainly intent on their own power, advancement and agendas. we’re talking huge jealousy issues amongst these guys.

  • 5. Wandering Coyote  |  June 3, 2007 at 2:23 pm

    Agreed. We’re also talking about the type of people out there who conveniently ignore the gospels and focus on the Old Testament.

  • 6. harpervalley  |  June 3, 2007 at 9:36 pm

    ….AND ignore the gnostic scriptures. ah well, ‘suiting life to themselves and imposing it on others’


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