Sunday Sermon by Crystal Methodist
Ha Hoo! Oh parishioners!!! Today we look at Mark. Well, we don’t really LOOK at him, rather, we heed his words. Hmm, perhaps not so much heed as evaluate. No, that wouldn’t be right either. We take in the signifigance of what he’s saying. Yes, I think that’s it.
You know, I had a boy sit beside me in grade 3 who’s name was Mark. We used to say, “What do you call a man correcting schoolwork? Mark”. Hoo hoo hoo. Anways, I digress. “Mary Magdalene, out of whom he had cast seven devils.” — Mark 16:9. Let’s face it, this lady was a tart and Jezebel. Never mind what modern theology may teach and that scholars have found Mark et al were jealous of her close relationship with The Babe in Swaddlings. Mark my word, hoo hoo, if she had of saved her cherry, like myself, she never would have had to have devils cast out.
This atheist slut probably even had , heh hem, oh, can I say it…abortions!! Never mind the etymology of the word means ‘to rise away from’, that’s just fodder for those spiritual types who think they have one over on religion. NO! NO! We must stick hard to the words and interpretations of the biggest political novel ever written….THE BIBLE!
Oops, I seem to have gotten carried away again. Flowers. Yes , who will volunteer to do the flowers next week?