The Lip Balm Before the Storm

December 5, 2006 at 12:29 pm 6 comments

samesexmarriagedebate3.jpg
Same sex marriage debate, eh? Well let Harper have his day before his fundie groupies…it will never pass….oh, what’s that, the wording of the motion ain’t what we think it is? Montreal Simon got a hold of it. Anyways, let’s look at the scrum today and see what ‘the big three’ have to say to each other:

Harper: You guys look great! Not as good as me, but. Anyways, here’s the deal. I’ll introduce the motion, then Layton and Dion, you can flip a coin to see who goes first.
Layton: Good plan. You in on this, Dion?
Dion: Oui.
Harper: Gee willikers, Dion, who did your makeup, Cirque de Soleil?
Harper and Layton: Hahaha!
Dion: Oui.
Layton: Harper, how about if I accuse you of being a homophobe?
Harper: Jackass, don’t be ridiculous. I’m a cross dresser like you. That’s all, it’s like a Ronnie Regan thing. I’m straight, really. I’m not a Queen.
Layton: I told you not to call me Jackass! O.K. then, Decieven, you got a better plan?
Harper: Ya. You come at it from a constitutional angle. Dion, you do the same, o.k.?
Dion: Oui.
Layton: Boring! We can attack from that position but there needs to be more hype so the world media will catch our attention.
Harper: Like duh, I already thought of that, Latent.
Layton: Don’t call me that, Stephanie!
Harper: And don’t call me that! Right, agreed, we really duke it out , hype the rhetoric and maybe get on CNN. You with us, Dion?
Dion: Oui.
Layton: Wait! I want the most equal air-time for opposition. Dion, you’re new, you’ll have to take the back seat, I’ve been after Steve’s jugular for a while, sort of.
Harper: True. Dion, will you comply?
Dion: Non.
Harper and Layton: WHAT!!!

Stay tuned!

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Entry filed under: Canada, Debate, Humour, Jack Layton, Politics, Same Sex Marriage, Stephane Dion, Stephen Harper.

Famous Stupid People #16 Due South?

6 Comments

  • 1. The Anon  |  December 5, 2006 at 1:58 pm

    Why Dion is so talkative?

  • 2. Q  |  December 5, 2006 at 3:51 pm

    Yikes!
    Harper looks like a character out of a David Lynch film. Truly grotesque, like his policies.

  • 3. harpervalley  |  December 5, 2006 at 4:55 pm

    the anon….well ya know, being the new kid on the harper front block, steve and jack are tending to fight for the spotlight a little harder.

    Q, it may be eraserhead himself!!!! now erase his policies and legacy and we’ll have a better world.

  • 4. jacobin  |  December 6, 2006 at 5:29 am

    oh look, the three mustbequeers

  • 5. jacobin  |  December 6, 2006 at 5:30 am

    not that there is anything wrong with that!

  • 6. Bill-Muskoka  |  December 6, 2006 at 12:51 pm

    Lip Balm, eh?

    Well, time for a little good old country logic then!

    Seems these two guys were riding along in their one horse sleigh.

    The driver noticed that his friend kept licking his lips and asked “Why do you keep licking your lips?”

    His friend replied “Because they are chapped and they hurt. I need some lip balm,”

    The sleigh driver told him ‘Licking them will only make them worse.”

    The friend replied “I know but I can’t stop doing it.”

    The driver then said “Listen, stick your finger in the horse’s arse, and then wipe it on your lips.”

    The friend asked ‘Will it act as a lip balm and heal them?”

    The driver replied ‘No, but I bet you will stop licking them!”

    Jingle Bells all the way!


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Winnder of # 52 is Great Aunty Bertha of Ecclectic Eccentricity
ANSWER = RICH COLEMAN

Winner of #51 is Coyote of Wandering Coyote
ANSWER = KIM CAMPBELL

Winner of #50 is Coyote of Wandering Coyote
ANSWER = RONALD REGAN

Winner of #49 is Coyote of Wandering Coyote
ANSWER = LINDA LINGLE

Winner of #48 is Coyote of Wandering Coyote
ANSWER = ELIZABETH DOLE

Winner of #47 is Coyote of Wandering Coyote
ANSWER = LIBERIA'S CHARLES TAYLOR

Winner of #46 is Coyote of Wandering Coyote
ANSWER = PHIL FONTAINE

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ANSWER = SARAH PALIN

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ANSWER = JUDGE JOHN G. ROBERTS

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ANSWER = ARNOLD SCHWARZENNEGAR

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ANSWER= DICK CHENEY

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ANSWER= ANITA BRYANT

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ANSWER= Ted Nugent

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ANSWER= Hillary Clinton

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ANSWER=TONY CLEMENTS

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ANSWER= STEPHEN HARPER

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ANSWER=MAYOR MARIE TRAYNOR OF CALEDONIA

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ANSWER=POL POT

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ANSWER=DON CHERRY

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ANSWER = BO DEREK

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ANSWER= PRINCE PHILIP

#29 AND 28 winner is Q of North of Center.
ANSWER = NANCY PELOSI, GEORGE WALLACE

# 27 Karen of Voyages of the HMS Swiftsure. ANSWER = BRIAN MULRONEY

# 26 Great Aunty Bertha of Eclectic Eccentricity. ANSWER: PRINCESS ANNE

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ANSWER: JOHN BAIRD.

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ANSWER: ANGELA MERKEL

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ANSWER: JIM PRENTICE

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#4 is BCWaterboy of The Kalamalka Rainbow. ANSWER= "Michael Chertoff"

#3 is Annamarie of Verbena-19 ANSWER= "Laureen Harper"

#2 is Anon...who shall remain anonymous. ANSWER= "Idi Amin"

#1 is Austin of WildDogRoad ANSWER: Imedla Marcos

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