Piggy-Boy Baird Rocks!

Now that John Howard has been ousted in Australia, the new Liberal Government’s Kevin Rudd has appointed former Midnight Oil singer Peter Garrett as Minister of Environment.   His Canadian counter-part, Piggy-Boy John Baird is seen here trying to keep up with the times (it’ll never happen):  

Who Owns the Northern Sea?

That’s a question an article in the Globe and Mail asks recently as Canada vies to hold onto the artic while the U.S., Russia, Norway and Denmark send their submarines to chart and claim whatever part of their continental plate can mapped.

WAIT! EVERYONE forgot about the Inuit, Yupik, Sami, Kalaallit and other indigenous groups of the north. Are we surprised? No. And it is each of the tribes who were told by Creator to care for the land and sea…the word own or sell do not exist. Giving the land is a post-colonial concept. It is with their determination that perhaps we can keep the polluting, whale killing ships to a minimum and war driven ships to zilch.

Man, you can try what you want, force what you want, but indigenous prophecies are what they are and those you can only turn around by action of spirit. Love to you so you can open your heart and turn around to truly help the world.

Read ‘em and Weep

So Harper decides to put together an ‘independant panel’ of ‘non-partisan’ former politicians to debate Canada’s missionary position in Afghanistan. Is the deck stacked or what? Two Liberals and three Conservatives (the NDP just doesn’t exist I guess). Atta boy, Steve, you’re showing us a real poker face now…and what will you do with your full house? Guess you can go running back to Mamma if you don’t agree with the panel or they bypass your recommendations, blame it on not going strictly with caucus , and perhaps pick up John Manley, chair of your panel, as an all new Conservative ‘I didn’t get where I wanted with the Liberals because of Paul Martin”.

Wonder what he’s got up his sleeve…bunnies….i doubt it. Pitbulls? That’s more like it.

Don’t worry Steve, your party will be there for you when the chips are down.
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Excellent breakdown of the ‘players’ by Alison at Creekside

Just Say ‘NO’ to Jesus

Steve-Joe is saying ‘no’ to illicit drugs…and Jesus. While being pulled over after church and failing the walk the yellow lie test, Steve confessed he was high on Christ.

Further investigation led to the PM confessing he had been talking in tongues and just wasn’t in the right state of mind to drive. He voluntarily placed himself in Babe in Swaddlings Anonymous and a driver’s program.
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*while Stever is concerned about drugs like Crystal Methodist and cocaine, saying the 60′s was an era that began illicit drug use, he forgets that pot, cocaine, heroin and opium were once legal and widely used throughout ever era. The 50′s cooled a bit on some of these drugs after being made illegal, but amphetemines were widely used during the ‘Leave it to Beaver’ phase.

So, Steve-Joe, when are you going to address the REAL problem of sustance abuse instead of hauling out the bandaids that will help stock up private prisons?

You want crack? Kiss Georgie’s ass again!

Oh What a Lovely War…..NOT

Canada’s new Foreign Affairs Minister, Maxine Bernier, made his debut at the United Nations. Bernier told the U.N. that “to appoint a high-level special envoy to Afghanistan, saying the monumental task of rebuilding and stabilizing the beleaguered country is too great for one nation “to tackle it alone.”

And by gum, he’s right…George needed propping up by a big Canuk, just like the U.S. needs Canada to continue keeping troops in Afghanistan. George looked a little stiff and grey in the arms of Bernier, but the Prez isn’t used to Quebecers. A quick telegram from Harper eased the puppethead of the U.S., so he later relaxed in Big Bernie’s arms , hugged his blankie and sucked his thumb.

Sunday Sermon by Crystal Methodist

I’m sorry, there will be no sermon today. The PM has summoned me for sniffer dog training in his new crack down on drugs..

I’m very honoured to be able to put my nose to use and can’t wait to get to Mr. Harper’s crotch…purely to show off my training, of course.

How Many Roads Must a Man Walk Down… (BEYOND DISTURBING CONTINUED)

‘Big Guy’ has had a lot on his mind lately…like how to keep uranium mining and weapons testing on the go, as well as making cocaine trade deals with Columbia. Homer Harper said it himself at the 2006 Gr8 Scumpit – Canada’s rescourses are for sale. No wonder Bush regards Harper as his little plebe. And nuclear…after the earthquake in Japan? I don’t think so!

YaYa Canada reports more plus sent me this link.
This and This are the best i could find on Frontenac and Silvio….MORE TO COME.

click on this to enlarge. from govt. of canada.

from govt. of canada 

The number of protestors near Sharbot Lake is growing:

CANADA’S VERY OWN “CHERNOBYL” NUCLEAR
DISASTER IN THE MAKING AT SHARBOT LAKE
JUST NORTH OF KINGSTON ONTARIO.

MNN. July 14, 2007. The standoff over uranium mining
at Sharbot Lake just north of Kingston Ontario is not a
conflict between “natives and non-natives” as the
Globe and Mail suggests. The dispute is between the
Indigenous landowners and the mining companies and
their colonial government puppets.

Non-natives who want a peaceful and healthy future for
their children are rallying in support of the Indigenous
owners of the land. In this instance nobody with any
sense is supporting uranium mining and the kind of
activities that turns the earth into a toxic waste dump.
In the past week Highways 509 and 7 were blocked to
protect our lands and the Ottawa/Mississippi rivers
watersheds from radioactive contamination.

A mysterious private company called “Frontenac
Ventures Corporation” FVC has been trespassing
on our land so it can extract our resources.

Beyond Disturbing

THIS IS OF UTMOST IMPORTANCE TO READ …IT’S BEYOND DISTURBING AND LOOKS LIKE CANADA IS WEAPONS TESTING , POSSIBLY NUCLEAR, IN ONTARIO ON FIRST NATION TERRITORIES….THIS AFFECTS US ALL:

“MANHATTAN PROJECT” AT SHARBOT LAKE

MNN. July 9, 2007. It’s becoming more and more apparent
that we are being used as “guinea pigs” for research and
experimentation by government funded mad scientists from
around the world. Remember “agent orange”, “LSD”,
ammunition testing at Sarcee and Ipperwash? You’d think
people would know better by now and be decent. No way,
Jose! It’s vicious disgusting and as slimy as a crude oil
slick floating on a lake full of dead fish. Canada thinks we
are expendable. They carry out psychological and physical
testing of weaponry on our lands. They sit back and stare
at us through binoculars and microcopes to see how we
are going to react.

On Sunday July 8th 2007 at 3:00 pm. The Algonquins of
Sharbot and Ardoc Lakes protested the rape and violation
of their land by blocking Highway 7, which is 42 miles
north of Kingston Ontario. They want to stop “Frontenac
Ventures Corporation”, Mining Resource Engineering
Limited MREL, Natural Resources Canada and Indian Affairs
from digging for uranium at a former mine site near Ardoc
north of Sharbot Lake Ontario. All of this is on unsurrendered
Indigenous land. This whole venture is starting to smell more
and more like sulfur and other explosives as well as uranium
mining.

Wear Red Underwear Friday

Yup, that thar’s really Stockwell ‘Doris’ Day, pourin’ himself a batch of Rocky Mountain campfire special blend java ( Starbucks and Tim’s grind boiled over an open fire, the ‘two mountain jig’ administered and voila). Nothin’ like a good cup o brew to wake ya up in the mornin’ lessen ya fall asleep at the constituency office.

Stocky-Baby’s gotta keep awake lest some terrorists invade small towns and bomb the pickle barrels with the checkers game on top. His HUGE, Medium, ok, pea-size brain (all right all right!) cauliflower is on orange alert constantly.

Dare HV even suggest a chemical sweetener?

Harper Signs Up

It’s the talk of the town….er, country. Canada’s casualties in Arfghanistan.

Ever the photo-op denier, Steve-Joe ‘signed up’ , donned uniform and is headed to Karzai’s money maker….I mean troubles. Tim Horton’s has stocked up to placate Steve’s appetite and he’ll serve for 2 hours in an office, filing and doing other ‘Klinger’ duties. Originally he wanted to play the role of Radar, but his heaing didn’t pass muster. Hmmm.

If all goes well, Steve says he’d like to move up to a more principle role and play Hawkeye or Honeycut, however the director Generals feel he’s more suited for Charles Emerson Winchester lll.

Have fun, Steve, and don’t forget to bring Boreen back a nice pink burka (Bev Oda would like pale blue).

The Knight is Dark

Well, well, well, Mr.’s Harper, Fontaine and Prentice. Looks like you all want to be the knights in shining armor and make that great legacy, lest a CN Rail engine goes up your collective arses. Guess you all grew up watching the same movies.

Harper announced his plans to ‘revolutionize’ the native land claim resolution process and he, Fontaine and Prentice are giggling with glee, for now, while they sit upon their steeds. OH OH boys! Look out….here comes THE TRUTH!!!

Let’s see, how much was the Kelowna accord that Harper ripped up going to cost? And now he’s going to dedicate $250 miilion a year for ten years to ‘solve the problem’? And WHAT is the truth of the matter? No matter what, claims have to be dealt with on a nation to nation basis…Harper has decided to set up an independant tribunal. Harper: “Instead of letting disputes over land and compensation drag on forever, fueling anger, frustration and uncertainty, they will be solved once and for all by impartial judges,”. Oh, I see…and who will these judges be, Steve? A panel made up of international diplomats? Steve, Canadian judges have been disregarding Canada’s own Rule of Law for , hmm, centuries…how will you ensure this tribunal will have no interests?

Ah yes, compromise…let’s give injuns bits of their land back, some sovereignty (note: some), but no mineral rights….well, hey, maybe there will be a cut to keep people happy.

Yoo hoo, Stevie! How come you recognize Quebec as a nation but not Indian Nations, as set out in ….READY…..TA DA……THE LAW!! Why don’t you just do your job as PM and order judges, premiers etc. to follow the law? Why don’t you follow the law, Stephen Joseph Harper? OH, I see , it’s too simple and you think you can convince the old ‘compromise’ game….you know, let’s move forward , win/win and all that. Do you really think Chief Terry Nelson is going to call off June 29th, the Day of Solidarity With First Nations?

Sir Lances BoilsAlot Harper sure knows how to bend Fontaine. Sir Philip Fountain of Goofs and Lord James Apprentass get to ride along side for the jousts that will follow. If you think natives will play Guinivere, send yourself a chain mail letter.

And speaking of following the law, how about signing this international online petition from the 6N Clan Moms….read it….you’ll learn the LAW.

BTW, Steve, Phil and Jim…you might try applying to Ajax as the white night, or to Monty Python as The Knights of Knickers’. Quit playing heroes, boys, and just do your job.
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*CBC’s follow up interview with Jim Prentice. Prentice says this new deal will help ensure June 29th is a peaceful day…what, like people gathering to support First Nations is automatically not peaceful? Seems we have some stereotyping and spin here because who’s been shooting and tasering gathered, unarmed natives for decades now? Prentice, you live in a dream world, turn off your t.v.!!

Sunday Sermon by Crystal Methodist

Ha Hoo! Parishioners! Today’s sermon will be short as I’ve been summoned to Europe. Rember, a little birdie told you this, but Mr. Harper has asked me to help tide things over his words about African Aid. It seems the good PM has some trouble explaining what the missionary position is there. My, my, the world seems to construe religion and sex as some abhorent mixup, but let me tell you…if we were all to assume missionary position a man could simply get his job done while we lay there saying Hail Mary’s, then there would be more time to devout to Jack Lord.

Hence today I shall leave you with The Good Book (not to be mistaken for T.V. Guide) and ask you to read Luke Warm, Timothy Leery, and Mark My Word. Have fun, behave, and if I’m lucky enough I’ll be able to have a chat with Boreen and get that tingly sensation all over again.
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FOR KAHENTINETHA HORN’S TAKE ON HARPER AND AFRICAN AID THAT TIES INTO THE ‘WANNABES GOTTABES’ POST BELOW CLICK HERE.

Jane Stewart Eats Dough

Former Lib Cabinet Minister Jane Stewart believes in the notion that ‘money talks’…so she’s eaten the dough the Ontario Goverment handed her to stall talks on Six Nation negotiations.

Jane: I like my money raw…no mustard, no ketchup. The true pulp flavour is the only way to go, well, maybe a dash of salt. If I can get those wretched Clan Mothers to put aside their foolish notions of what is right, stall them, grind them down, then maybe we’ll have time to innoculate some blankets with smallpox to give them. Wait….Avian flu would be more 21st century! We’ll dupe them with chickens. That’s it…we’ll import chickens from China and make it look like a big government handout. Sure, the public may balk that the indians are getting something else for free, after all we did air drop t-shirts with Canadian flags…but in the end it’s worth it. Oh, and I like to wash my dollar sandwhiches down with red wine…..white is for poultry, if you know what i mean.

FROM MNN NEWS:
SIX NATIONS’ GROOVY TAKEOVER: HAGERSVILLE OR BUST!

MNN. May 30, 2007. Just when we thought Jane Stewart was gone from our lives, she pops up like a dirty shirt. For $1,300 a day, why not? She’s the former mouthpiece for Ontario at the “talks” about returning our stolen land to us. She moaned, “The Feds and Ontario are going to walk away from the table because of that “gun incident” [a few days ago]. What? That had nothing to do with us. It was a personal dispute.

Would the city of Toronto stop all business at City Hall because there was an incident on Yonge Street where someone robbed someone at gunpoint? Does Parliament come to a grinding halt because someone stuck up a bank down the street? It appears that Ontario is trying to get out of settling our land claims. They want an excuse, any excuse. Quick! Does someone have a hangnail? These colonists get hysterical and irrational when they get cornered, don’t they?

Canada and Ontario, you have to start taking responsibility for your acts of brutality. Remember when you sent in the Ontari-ario Provincial Police OPP, on April 20, 2006, and attacked us? They arrived at 4:30 a.m. with weapons galore, beating, berating, arresting and shooting some of us in the face with high powered pellet guns! [Those guys need a mom to tell them ‘no’, it’s not right!] We were unarmed and managed to send the OPP running. Another thing! Why is the fully armed OPP whizzing past us every 5 minutes!!! What about the inflated gas prices? Maybe they just don’t care about the Ontario taxpayers.

At the “talks” on Tuesday, May 22, we reminded Canada and the Province about the Two Row Wampum agreement, “You don’t have a voice in the decisions we make. If you keep putting your hands in our canoe and trying to steer it, you’re going to get splashed every time.” We told them to get their baggage out of our canoe and stay in their boat.

About twenty of our Six Nations people waved flags and played ceremonial drums while the OPP stood by and watched us stop the unlawful construction on our land at Hagersville. They never got our permission to do anything there. Why weren’t the cops arresting the developers? What’s their next assignment? Holding the door open for bank robbers? We want our property to be left alone until we’re ready and things are settled to our satisfaction.

Hagersville is part of the Haldimand tract, which runs about 10 kilometres on each side of the Grand River. This land is part of the vast Six Nations territory along the St. Lawrence River, around the Great Lakes watershed, down to New York State, Vermont and beyond. In 1784 the Six Nations did not receive the land from the British during the American Revolution. This Tract of one million acres was specially protected from encroachment by settlers “for the Mohawks and their posterity forever”.

Canada and the Province keep threatening they won’t give us back Kanohnstaton, which they say they took into “trust”. Is it something like bank robbers who hold the stolen money in trust! We told them plainly, “You need to get your paws off Kanenhstaton ASAP”. The Plank Road Agreement needs to be addressed, Canada needs to obey the laws and live up to the rule of law. The developer has to CONSULT with the Six Nations Confederacy.

Ontario’s Minister of Aboriginal Affairs David Ramsay said their bargainers were “displeased” about being caught in another theft, “We should have peace and no further escalation.” Right! So stop your thuggery! Go home! Leave us alone!

Developer, Dan Valentine, picked up his tools and left. He agreed with us, “They have the claim, clearly something exists. They’ve been trying to reach out to the government to settle this, and it hasn’t been settled.”

Under the Haida, Taku and Mikkisew Supreme Court rulings, anyone directly involved in land development where land “claims” exist is in “CONTEMPT OF COURT”. Canadians can’t just march in and take whatever they want according to the map they saw in grade two. Whenever there is a valid land claim, there has to be consultation. Otherwise it’s not legal.

Jim Prentice Quits to run for Assembly of First Nations

Ottawa’s Department of Redskin Affairs (and other extra-marital matters) has quit his post as Minister to run in the next Assembly of Fist Nations. Donning full regalia, Prentice held a press conference outside his backyard sweatlodge today.

“It cost me $200 to rent this outfit…all I ever wanted from the Ministry was a real buckskin outfit complete with headress, but would any Indian Band give me one? Huh? Huh? So now I’m running against Fil Phontaine because he’s gone from playing Ghandi on our payroll to being some kind of terrorist and insurgent, backing calls to blockade rail lines. There’s rumours a great-great-great-grandmother was half Mohawk or something like that. I’ll win them with humour too, check this:

What’s the definition of confusion? Father’s Day on the rez. Har har harharhar!

Why I’ll show that little s.o.b. Phontaine! Wait, am I taller than him? Nevermind, his days are numbered. Chief Terry Nelson and him are being very short sighted for the sake of their people. HOW do you think the Rez’s get their used clothes, rotten timber, green SPAM and eggs? Huh, tell me, hell, I’ll tell you…BY TRAIN!!! That’s right, the Purina Gravy Train!

Phontaine’s JOB is to keep the savages down…like why can’t he just play some nice classical music for Nelson, feed him beer, send him to a casino or something. How else can the government exploit resources but by keeping them calm with tainted fry-bread? instead I get this nonsense about June 29th being a big day of blockades and protests. Bah!

Man this outfit’s hot! I’ve gone commando too…heh heh, wait till the squaws get a peak of my little, er , I mean big one-eyed whitefish. Hi Ho, Silverado!

Confessions of an Insurgent

I confess. After reading THIS, I am convinced they should cuff me immediatley. In fact I may turn myself in….turn myself into what, I don’t know but it won’t be an apple (red on the outside, white on the inside).

Maybe they should come and get me right now. After all, if promoting or taking part of anything to do with Native Indian Sovereignty is a crime then throw me in Canadian Gitmo and pass the pemican, please. For gawd’s sake….I’ve posted stories here on indigenous sovereignty….I have a link to a website I created that has articles of ‘terrorist’ activities like reclaiming land in a peaceful way, promoting prayers, poking phun at the OPP, pointing to government and organization websites and addressess to pen letters, pickin on Gary MacHale, and overuse of the letter ‘P’ in general.

Note how I look….this is how insurgents look. Fangs to vampirically bite the necks of those who uphold the colonial system. Shiny, wonky eyes (the better to see them with), devi’s horns (they’re really e.s.p. antenae but don’t tell anyone that), Mr. Spock ears (to better hear them with). My heavens and stars, someone who promotes things like THIS legal opinion that shows the North American governments are in fraud and treason unto themselves, therefore not legal entities should be put away forever for seeing and pointing out the truth…because we all know THE TRUTH is not what BiG BROTHER wants us to know. Here, I’ll post some dangerous words, ‘ROCK ON SIX NATION CLAN MOTHERS, GO DEH CHO GO, INDIGENOUS PEOPLE OF THE WORLD IGNITE (please light your smudges to say prayers).

If authorities don’t come and get me within two weeks I shall have to go to them and beg them to shackle me. It may be the only photo-op I get with Stephen Harper.

Remember to send cakes with files in them (no no no, not for breaking out, how could you think of letting a non-dangerous person out of jail!!!!….it’s for keeping a decent manicure and pedicure). OH, I promise to send postcards from the Hague!!!!

Harper Says Ya Gotta Play by the Rules

Primordial Steve Harper feels the Liberationals are not playing by the rules. Somewhere, the other day, there was a news article about The Harp Seal not liking the Liberals critisising all the stuff about Canada, Afghanistan, O’Connor’s stupidity etc……I’m sitting on the beach right now so I don’t feel like looking it up, but you can.

Anyways, the game seems to be like this: Follow Bush to the end of the cliff and jump off like a lemming. As you go down, act tough, and say that if you critisize anything it means you are not supporting the troops. Hold the handy dandy Stars and Stripes you keep in your back pocket and use it as a parachute. Call upon the American Eagle or hawk or something to rescue you. When none of this works have a hissy fit as you fall towards the rocky bottom.

When you hit the dirt blame everyone else in the world. Remove all shards and call the doctor to take the ones out of your arse. Continue life from the pit and yell about fire and brimstone and how the sinners are will perish. Talk about an election.

It’s a great game and comes with regulation plastic soldiers and real live ammo
!!!!!! You can order it online for $599.00 or pirate it from http://www.system.com.

Have fun but don’t sink my battleship.

Great Start for 2007 !!!

January 1st saw the best start to the New Year with the flag of the Iroquois Nation flying high. Congratulations to those who worked hard to reclaim the Iroquois longhouse that was shut down in 1924.

Most Canadians do not realize the signifigance of this and other reclamations by First Nations. In order to proceed forward in proper fashion, we must first go back. Correcting the illegalities of settler law brings us closer to acting as true as a democracy as we can. This effects not only First Nations but women, gays, the disenfranchized, the environment, and the very crux of how governance should operate…if we were a true democracy we wouldn’t see a party system. Taking the politics out of goverance is what it’s all about so decision making can be based on the laws of nature and leaders arise and act from the voice of the people.

William Lyon Mackenzie King, you may be rolling in your grave by this and other indigenous peoples movements, but I can only wish your spirit well being and peace.

Congrats again to Six Nations….email Hazel Hill at thebasketcase@on.aibn.com to send yours

Inspector Stockwell Gadshit – Be Very Afraid

CTV reports that a Russian spy has been deported. Stockwell, of course, is taking credit even though somewhere in someone’s archives there’s a good report on him giving the libs shit for not being fair to the guy…something like that, you know how concerned i am at making this a journalism site.

The CTV story mentions Paul William Hampell as being part of the ‘feared’ KGB…guess the government is concerned Russia will uncover Steve’s plot to take over the world. Confiscated items from this ‘dangerous’ spy include:
A fraudulent Ontario birth certificate in a travel pouch under his shirt
A Canadian passport
$7,800 in five different currencies
Several bank and credit cards
Index cards with detailed notes about Canadian history
Three cellphones
Five SIM cards, used for when a cellphone user changes countries; several were password-protected
Two digital cameras
A shortwave radio

I know I’m afraid….very afraid. Stockwell, thanks for saving the Cuntry.

From the Archives…O Santa Bin Laden

A MUSLIM CHRISTMAS
Come they told me a’Ramdamadumb
An arab babe to see a’Ramadamdumb
Brown skinned brown eyed you’ll see a’Ramadamdumb
So shocking you will pee a Ramadamdum Ramadamdumb Ramadamdumb
Religious myth whle you sit on a knee
a Ramadamdumb , sucking my thumb

The Little Bummer Boy

Please, no election, pah rup pah pah pum
I can’t get an erection, pah rup pah pah pum
Dion and Duceppe too, pah rup pah pah pum
Stop talking about my poo, pah rup pah pah pum, rap pah pum , rap pah pah pum
So to honour me, pah rap pah pah pum
While I pick my bum.