Stephen Harper’s Economic Plan

 While his opponents called last night for Primordial Minister Stephen Harper to unveil a Conservative economic plan…Steve kept them waiting in the wings until he could release his plan this morning.

FINALLY realizing Canada can no longer afford to ride on the coat tails of George Bush’s You-ess-ian nightmare, Steve has unveiled ‘THE CANRO’, a new monetary unit he pledges will help keep Canada in the black.

“God was late talking to me on this one, but the other day I was leaning against the church wall to let fly with my signature “Silent but Deadly’ one.  Halleluja, what should pop out but a dollar bill actually composed of potash, uranium, water, diamonds and tar sands!”.  

Steve says Canadians will have to catch him on windy days and rip a section of the CANRO off.  He warns that taking too many of the one-plies may result in diverticulosis for him, so to go easy.  ”I am suffering enough with this, but I suffer so you don’t have to”, says Steve.  He also alluded to lambs as commodities and threw in something about being born in swaddlings and placed amongst bullrushes.  

Good luck, Steve…may the arse be with you!